sunday's swirl

do i know what the rest 
of the situation's light shed
rain nicked along

weeding laptop's photographs 
insistent clack of in-progress 
espresso alarms the dream

embarrassed by my rageful response to last night's too late biblical inquiry
i should have explained that i lost joseph long ago when i forgot jesus.

i wanna stop half-assing my life and finally give it my entire ass.

deep into the pubic curl of late summer lush
what hair i have foretold the imminent rain

christmas lights wire, 
coiled black & sinuous 
planted into tree-shape in 
the front junk yard of 
the hippie house 
jars me into seeing 
the tree as the cross of life, 
an earth cross, arms spread, 
splayed for the sun's assault, 
tree is the son of sun, 
begging father for 
light, life

fading, dying. some shine ago.

arms spread, palms licked, cloud slicked & sliced with veins, 
arms spread, root deep asleep in the bark dark, a toe lifted 
cracks the moist black cake. the dirt roots are buried in. 
where is your root dirt? 

i could cry with her and we don't have much time.

i turned on the tv for weather and found a weeping husband searching for his songwife's near murderer.

there are crows we don't 
know who we think we 
know and they, they 
know we don't, we don't
know...

her craved company, her vicinity, her planet, her body, my heart, deprived until it was depraved, moaning in its creaking ribs, unstroked and peeling, fleck scarred, chipped, my lips, leashed, leapt anyway

i could not keep the warmth of her with me 
for the rest of the day i tried but half-way 
i found it starved dead in a dark quiet pocket 
and not in my arms her warmth was a stone 
in a yard i visit to remind me of love?

"when you can't forget the gifts you didn't get"

"he don't pay this no attention."

"the ambition that was punished has now been pardoned."